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Sep
30
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 I recently asked on my Facebook page how many of my friends have special needs* and are raising special needs children. I believe, at the time of this writing, we are up to two other parents who are considered disabled raising disabled children. The reason I ask is that my husband and I are disabled*. This fact presents many of life’s challenges just for our personal lives, never mind how we are a spouse to one another or a parent to our children. And I wondered just how many other parents out there have this unique situation.
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Blog Posts by Heather E. Sedlock
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Aug
24
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It seems bullying happens at every school, in almost every grade. Even the most proactive schools with anti-bullying education programs have trouble with bullying. I also have noticed that over generations, the easiest kids to pick on for bullies are special needs kids: the ones who are less able to defend themselves. Even children who are non-verbal can recognize that they are being teased. I’ve seen the tears streaming down these kids’ faces with my own eyes after they were harassed by other students. Now that I have special needs children myself, I feel hyperaware of the bullying that goes on. I’m afraid my children will be picked on for those wonderful differences that make me love them so much. During the past school year, I noticed my oldest son has more of an issue with bullying than my youngest son. The only problem is, it’s my son doing the bullying! I can’t tell you how shocked I was.
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Jun
03
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This past weekend, Jerry and I took the boys to a hotel for what was supposed to be a single night; it turned into a four-day weekend. Our air conditioner broke and Jerry, because of health issues, cannot breathe in hot, humid weather. And I should mention that the air conditioner did more than break: it caught on fire. It was a small fire, but did a lot of damage to the unit. Here it is the fifth day and we are still waiting for the HVAC guy to finish the job he started. We ran out of “extra” money for a hotel but thankfully, after the tornadoes came through, the weather has cooled somewhat. But it got me to thinking: maybe Jerry and I should go to one by ourselves some night, and leave the kids at home.
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May
05
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One thing that struck me recently was the old saying “Children live what they learn.” If kids see a parent behaving badly towards another family member or being disrespectful even to their kids, the child will absorb those lessons as well and act the same way in return. We cannot expect our own children to be responsible, accountable adults when they grow up if we are not acting as responsible, accountable adults during their childhood years.
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Apr
21
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As many parents have learned the world over, not every program will work for every child, every time. Sometimes you have to take bits and pieces of different programs and meld them together to suit your individual child. For the most part, The Total Transformation Program has worked beautifully all on its own without any supplemental help. We’ve seen real progress in both our sons, Thomas (11) and Brandon (8). We’ve seen progress in ourselves, as well. (We’re about to go into week three now, identifying how to be coaches in the learning process our children are going through to gain coping skills.)
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Apr
01
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Our family is going through the Total Transformation Program together, and this week, we learned that it is really important for parents to understand they need to “parent the child they have.” James Lehman says, “Although they don’t realize it, parents have two choices when confronted with difficult children: to continue to parent as if their child is the child they dreamed of parenting, or to develop the skills necessary to parent the child they actually have.” My husband and I learned that some children become aggressive if you behave passively. If you do not respond to them, they will ramp up the behavior, not stop it! (No wonder for all that time I tried to ignore the negative and praise the positive, I failed at improving my son Thomas’s behavior!)
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Feb
24
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Recently changes have been made in our house. We’ve completed a few Total Transformation lessons and we have noticed an actual change in Thomas, our oldest, who is diagnosed with Oppositional Defiant Disorder, Bipolar Disorder, ADHD and Autism. | |||
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Feb
04
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Whenever we’ve started a new discipline technique, or have added to it or taken away from it, we’ve discussed the changes with our children. It’s gratifying to know that James Lehman also agrees with this action. The discussion depends on age and developmental levels. However, now Thomas is 11 and Brandon is 8 and both are able to understand the concepts of “punishment,” “discipline,” etc. We sat the boys down at the dining room table for a family discussion. I spoke for Daddy and I and made it clear that I was speaking on behalf of the “parental unit” that we are together. Some call that a “united front.” What follows is the basic agenda I followed:
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