EmpoweringParents.com

“Catch your child being good,” the experts all say. “Tell them when they did something well.”

Great advice. But how often do we as parents catch ourselves being good? And how often do we actually take time to savor a good moment between us and our not-always adorable children?

It’s hard to remember, to be honest, especially when your child acts out, is defiant, won’t do chores, or yells at you in front of your summer guests as your ferry boat docks on the most populated island in Maine. (Check, check, check, and check.)

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Ever get stuck trying to give the right consequences to your young child or toddler? Know that whether they’re 18 months or five years old, you should always try to do the following three things when giving consequences:

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Last month, I received the invitation that all parents dread. I knew this day was coming: The Chuck E. Cheese Birthday Party.

The worst part was, there was no way to get out of it — the birthday girl was one of my son’s best friends from pre-school, and his future bride, according to both of them.

So I did what any good mom would do. I grit my teeth and emailed back my reply: “Of course we’ll be there! Alex is so excited.”

As the day approached, I had flashbacks to two prior parties at this frenetic, migraine-inducing establishment. At the first, I lost my son in the habitrail tunnel for a good 30 minutes. (He was purposely blocking up the pipe like some kind of toddler hair clump.) And at the second, a random child vomited pizza on my feet. You know how when someone yawns, it makes everyone around them yawn? Uh huh. You get the picture.

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How do you know your child is old enough to use the public restroom by himself?

Last week, my husband was out of town, and I took my son to the “Super Great Wall Buffet” — our favorite cheap all-you-can-eat joint. I was all excited to have an evening out with my son, and also glad not to have to rustle up a meal using the minimal contents of my refrigerator. (”Hey Honey, how about applesauce-pasta-curry tonight?”)

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Update: The father who dropped off his 9 children under the Safe Haven law has spoken to the press about why he left his kids at the hospital. Sadly, his wife died 17 months ago, leaving him to care for his children, and he was not able to financially, emotionally and mentally take care of them. You can read his story here. Other children have been left at hospitals since the Safe Haven law went into effect, and Nebraska lawmakers are currently working to clarify its meaning — and also are encouraging parents to seek outside help before abandoning their children.

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I’m not the kind of mom who knows what to do at any given moment. You’ve seen her, I’m sure: the hip, together mom who looks great and says the right thing all the time. She’s the same kind of mom who always packs tissues, wholesome snacks, handiwipes, and an age-appropriate activity for her child to do, no matter the occasion. No, I’m more like the I-hope-I-brushed-my-hair-before-I-left-the-house kind of mom, the kind who frantically looks for a used Dunkin’ Donuts napkin when my son’s nose starts running. More often than not, I’m flying by the seat of my pants and hoping that they’re not ripped, mismatched or stained. (Just in case you were wondering, the pants are  OK about one time out of ten, give or take.)

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OK, get this: the hottest kindergarten accessory is not a backpack, lunchbox, or new pair of sneakers. It’s a cell phone. That’s right — I was talking to Bob Lotter, founder of the mobile phone watchdog company Radar, and he told me that in L.A. at least, many parents are investing in cell phones for their kindergartners. (In case you’re wondering, the buttons on the phone are large and easy to use. Children are only able to call the numbers you program into the phone.)

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Jessica tells Sophie she can’t play dress-up with her and her group of friends because Sophie doesn’t watch Hannah Montana.  Three boys form a “gang” at day camp and terrorize the rest of the kids during free time.  Pop Quiz: How old are the kids I’m talking about here?  Read more »