How Jon Gosselin Inspired Me: It’s Never Too Late to Be a Responsible Parent
Posted By: Annita Woz
Category: News
Comments: 9
I have just been inspired by Jon Gosselin.
Jon Gosselin is of course the other half of Kate Plus 8, the popular reality show that has lately seen ratings plummet as the real life antics of Jon’s infidelities cause his marriage to disintegrate.
Admittedly, Jon doesn’t have a good track record, starting with the obvious worry that he chose to make money featuring the sweet faces of his eight children (and their sometimes not-so-sweet behaviors) on a weekly show.
Some would call that exploitation. But for the past few years, viewers have been willing to be a part of that user relationship. Everyone has been watching these ordinary parents do one extraordinary thing: survive parenting despite being sleep-deprived, short on lap space, and tight on square footage, and doing it all while on camera.
Then, the reality got too real.
Viewers saw Jon partying, shots of him going clubbing, the dating before divorcing, and then of course the media talk show circuit where he publicly complained and aired the marriage’s dirty laundry.
Now, Jon and Kate are essentially single parents.
Single parenting — a place people don’t often look for inspiration – is a place where Herculean feats are accomplished without much fanfare, certainly without a TV crew or free trips to Hawaii and likely without the benefit of strangers sending gifts to children when mom or dad are tight on money during the holidays.
Here is a guy who is at rock bottom. He loses his marriage, his job, his income. He is an out-of-work dad in the middle of a divorce and he has eight kids to feed and love. Losing what little privacy he has not already sold, he’s on the bottom of the rotten-daddy and rotten-husband heap and yet, in a shining moment, like a missing diamond ring trapped in the dust at the bottom of the vacuum cleaner bag, we see a glimmer of responsible parenting from Jon.
Jon is not just playing a dad on TV – he is being a dad on TV – because beyond single parenting, Jon is experiencing a loud wake-up call about responsible parenting and is suggesting the eight kids should not be on the show, as it may be detrimental to their well-being.
He’s gotten serious. He is being father-like, mature even, when he wakes up long enough from his fake family life on screen and responsibly suggests that no amount of money is enough payment to justify having their little lives, their tantrums, their pain, featured on television as they struggle through the mess their parents have made.
Average mom here, I recognize that I have kids who throw fits, kids who are disrespectful, kids who know how to push my buttons to the point of parental madness. After making so many parenting mistakes, after being at the end of my rope, losing my temper umpteen times, and clearly misplacing the Child 101 Instruction Manual, Jon makes me realize that it is never too late to be a responsible parent and try again to get it right.
Annita Woz is a mom and parent blogger for EP. Read the complete bios of all our contributors and parent bloggers here.
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October 13th, 2009 at 4:59 am
I am a single parent of 6 myself. I watch a lot of single parents with 1 or 2 children go crazy for money that they want but don’t need. I think that putting 8 kids on TV for money so you don’t need to “really work” is appalling. It was good to hear someone, especially their father, stood up for them finally. I am pleased to see he can look past the fame for 2 minutes and think about his kids (even if it was just 2 minutes). That diamond in the rough thing holds water I guess. At any rate, I guess I wanted to say I know how hard parenting can be with 2 parents (and 1 is even harder) but when the will and love is there, you can do anything. I have lost my children to foster care in the past and that taught me that every second I have with them is to be cherished and that any behavior issues (on our part as parents and our children’s) are just that, issues, and can be overcome and make us stronger, smarter parents.
October 13th, 2009 at 9:07 am
I agree that getting the kids off TV, finally, is the right thing to do. But crediting that to any parental responsiblity by Jon Gosselin seems misplaced to me. He didn’t do it while he was still making money off his children. He did it once he was already cut out of the profits and the show was converted to Kate plus 8. It simply looks like more selfishness by an already morally bankrupt human being. Giving him credit for responsible parenting is an affront to single parents everywhere who are out there every day puting their kids’ needs ahead of their own.
October 13th, 2009 at 9:31 am
I agree with the previous post. I feel he only wants his children off the show, because he has been pulled off the show, not because he thinks it is bad for his children. I beleive he thinks this is a game and he is loosing, so he is going to pull this card and see where it gets him. He is so immature, I think all eight of his children are more mature than him. It’s so sad!
October 13th, 2009 at 9:38 am
Supporting Jon Gosselin’s new found decision to pull his kids off TV conveniently after he was fired, seems misplaced. Two parents who were willing to work on their marraige would be something to give praise to.
Also, who says the kids will be better off if they are not on TV? In order to support 10 kids in a normal manner, will require two working parents. Most jobs are outside of the home. I work full time outside of the home and I don’t get to see me kids as much as I would like. The children will not be with either of their parents much of the time. Ideally, it would get them out of the limelight which would be good but will they ever really escape the public at this point? We do not know what the future holds for them and can not say what is best.
October 13th, 2009 at 10:02 am
i think you are mistaken. jon’s choice to take the kids off the show is one of vengeance towards his x-wife.
October 13th, 2009 at 12:16 pm
Good points EP readers! Should he get applause after all the bad he has done? Should he get on his high horse now that he has sunk to such lows and claim he is looking out for the kids? should he be looked up to for shirking his responsibilities to his kids and his marriage the way he has?
InsanityRains makes a good point that single parenting is an enormous challenge and a motivator for good parenting and certainly the onslaught of emotional, financial, legal, physical challenges of navigating through a divorce and custody agreement must push even good parents near the edge of insanity and exhaustion.
I don’t applaud Jon’s actions leading up to his divorce and I imagine there is some amount of revenge on Kate going on- a messy mental mind-game that is played as a survival reaction to the death of a marriage- that drives his behaviors and decsions and statements.
He said to remove them from the show- and I’m also wondering when (if?) Kate will say the same thing?
October 13th, 2009 at 1:00 pm
Seriously? You’re giving credit to Jon Gosselin? I’m not blind & I’m with the others who can clearly see. What he’s doing is not for his children. It’s because he wasn’t a good enough father that he got booted off the show. Now he’s using childish antics to try to stick it to his wife while he’s busy living his “new” life with 22-year-old Hailey Glassman - who’s the daughter of Kate’s tummy-tuck plastic surgeon. Busy hanging out in St Tropez or looking for his new pad in Trump Place. Please! A good father? Not even!
October 13th, 2009 at 3:05 pm
excellent point zoesmom; can he ever truly be a good father after all he has done/is doing? is there any hope at all that bad parents can get it together and get their priorities in line? what does it take to turn a parent’s rotten behaviors around?
October 22nd, 2009 at 1:56 pm
I have been holding my tongue in the whole time that this “scandal” has taken place. Neither Jon, nor Kate make the “parent of the year” list. Both parents are putting themselves first, which is a sad, sad thing. Those children are being exploited, but I also know that MY own children have learned a great lesson from watching the show. The reality is, they are people just like you and me. They make mistakes, have bad judgment, and plain out screw up just like the rest of the world does. Nothing in life is perfect, but we do the best with what we have. My only question/concern right now is, what will happen in ten years when either parent realizes that they made the worst mistake by breaking up the family in the first place? There are wonderful therapists out there, and really taking the time to commit to counselling could have done wonders for them and their children while they were still married. As for removing them from the show… How in the world is Kate and Jon going to afford to raise these kids now that their lives have become so public? She belongs at home with them….And so does he! They made the commitment, for a second time in Hawaii, and promised their children that no matter what they would always love each other and stay together. That taught the children something there….Promises are made to be broken! I’m not sure that the damage that has been done to these children is going to be corrected by just cancelling the show.