End the Nightly Homework Struggle
5 Homework Strategies that Work for Kids

Are you trapped in a nightly homework struggle with your child? The list of excuses can seem endless: “I don’t have any homework today.” “My teacher never looks at my homework anyway.” “That assignment was optional.” “I did it at school.” If only your child could be that creative with their actual homework, getting good grades would be no problem!

“Answer Me When I’m Talking to You!”
What to Do When Your Child Ignores You

If your child deliberately ignores you, pretends not to hear your requests, and refuses to greet you or others, read on to see how you can deal with their behavior without losing your cool.

Living with Little Lawyers: Don’t Over-negotiate with Your Child

If you are a parent who negotiates constantly with your child, you probably feel like you’re living with a little lawyer who “objects” to every rule and request and wears you down with endless questions and challenges. With some kids, everything becomes a negotiation, and it starts from the time they get up in the morning until the time they put off going to bed.

Eliminate “Shut up!” from Your Family’s Vocabulary

If your child tells you to shut up, the best thing to do is not give it power. By arguing, talking and fighting back, you’re giving it power. Instead, the next time it happens, try saying, “Don’t talk to me that way, I don’t like it,” and turn around and leave the room. When things have calmed down, tell your child what the consequence is for his or her rude behavior. And by the way, there should be regular consequences in the house for things like cursing, name calling, and rude behavior. And they should be functional consequences, like “No cell phone for 24 hours.” That way, kids know what will happen if they break the rules, and you don’t have to repeat it every time. So you don’t have to fight with them, just use the consequences that you think would be most effective with your child, whether it’s no video games for 24 hours, or taking away their cell phone for a day.

“F--- You, Mom!” How to Stop Your Child
from Cursing in Your Home

Don’t pick up that bar of soap yet! James Lehman, MSW has great advice for parents on what to do when their child has a foul mouth, from generalized cursing to verbal abuse.

If your child curses at you, what you need to understand is that they’re trying to hurt you, throw you off balance, or suck you into you into a fight. I believe that families should have clear rules about cursing. There shouldn’t be any discussion about it when it happens. And in my mind, there’s a difference between kids cursing in general or cursing at you or another family member, and calling you rude names. But either way, families need to establish rules around it.

“My Kid Won’t Get Out of Bed”
Stop the Morning Madness Now

The alarm goes off and the morning battle begins: you knock on your child’s bedroom door to wake him, but you have to go back time and again to make sure he’s actually up, your voice rising with each “wake-up call.” As the minutes tick by and he still hasn’t gotten out of bed, you resort to screaming and yelling in his face, and then tear the blankets off the bed. In desperation, you pull him out of bed by his feet, though you know you won’t be able to do that for many more years.

Are You Caught in a Tug-of-War with Your Child?
“Don’t Test Me!”

When our children refuse to do what we ask them, it can feel like we’re caught in a tug-of-war, with both sides pulling on the end of the rope as hard as they can, and neither side making much headway.

Freaked Out Part I:
Understanding Kids with Anxiety

This is part one of a two-part series on anxiety in children by James Lehman, MSW. In the first article, James will discuss how to understand and identify anxiety in children. Next week, he'll give you some constructive advice on how to help children manage anxiety successfully.

Does Your Child Say This? “That's boring!”

When adolescents say something is boring, what they’re often expressing is a low level of anger and frustration. My guess is that this comes from the fact that either they don’t have anything interesting to do and they’re frustrated, or the task they have to do isn’t exciting and requires attention and energy. So when you say, “It’s time to go do your math now,” and a teen responds, “Math is so boring,” they’re expressing a low level of frustration and anger about having to do their math homework, probably because math is boring to them.

Reduce Homework Hassles with these Simple Tips

Homework can be difficult for most kids during the school year, but it can become a major challenge when you have a child with ADHD. But here’s some good news for exhausted parents: if you take the right steps now, at the beginning of the school year, homework hassles can be kept to a minimum. The key is to be organized and plan ahead to minimize the frustration your child is bound to experience around multiple homework assignments. Begin by tackling the two most important places: school and home.

How to Deal with Teens with Attitude

With a new school year starting, many parents find themselves gearing up for another round of bad attitudes and power struggles with their kids. Teens and pre-teens especially seem to have an “I don’t care,” or “Why bother?” attitude about school, homework and their other responsibilities, whether it be chores around the house or a part-time job. Do you find yourself asking your teen, “How will you ever make it in life if you don’t take these things seriously now?”

Parenting Tip of the Week: Help Teens Combat
Back to School Anxiety

It’s common for kids to have a lot of anxiety about the start of the school year, especially if they’re entering a new grade or going to a new school. All of these issues weigh very heavily on the minds of teens and pre-teens. And children with any type of impairment—whether it be a neurological, physical or behavioral—will have anxiety levels that are even more intense than kids who don’t.

Angry Child? Fix the Behavior, Not the Feelings

Many parents make the mistake of assuming that since their child’s behavior is connected to their feelings, fixing the feelings will fix the behavior. Unfortunately, nothing could be further from the truth. It’s critical for parents to understand that processing your child’s feelings while they are happening is not constructive.

Beat the Back to School Power Struggle in 30 Days
(The Secret? Start Now!)

I’ve worked with many parents and children caught up in power struggles in the home—they argued over bedtime, homework, curfew, video game time—you name it, they fought over it. And the more these parents fought with their children, the better at arguing and manipulating situations their children seemed to get. Mothers and fathers came to me exhausted, frustrated and desperate to stop the constant tug-of-war going on in their homes.

How to Stop Arguing and Start Talking with Your ADHD Child

I often joke that kids with ADHD would make great politicians or lawyers, because they never give up a fight!  Trying to cope with a child who argues at the drop of a hat can test the patience of any sane person. Not surprisingly, over the years many parents have asked me what they can do to make the arguing stop. What you can do is help your children turn their ability to argue into a positive trait rather than a negative one.