Holding Down the Fort: U.S. Army Base Provides the Total Transformation Program to Military Families

With soldiers’ deployments to Iraq and Afghanistan being extended time after time, stress for military families is at an all time high these days. According to the American Psychological Association, currently there are 700,000 children in the U.S. who have at least one deployed parent, and many have experienced a second, or even a third deployment. At Ft. Drum in Watertown, N.Y., Chaplain Keith Kilgore is attempting to help the military families under his care deal with child behavior problems more effectively by providing them with The Total Transformation Program. The chaplain is using this step-by-step multimedia program developed by noted behavioral therapist James Lehman to help stay-behind parents manage the challenging behaviors of their children and teens.

“James Lehman’s teaching is helping my families a great deal,” said Chaplain Kilgore. “It gives parents something to fall back on, and stops them from being a drill sergeant for their kids. It gives them true parenting skills.” Initially, Kilgore ordered the program because “a lot of times you have single and dual army parents. When mom and dad are both deployed, children are left with relatives and care-takers that are much more lenient than their parents. Then, when parents come back, the kids are mad that they left them for so long, and they’ve also developed bad habits living with the other caretaker who may have been softer on them.”

Jennifer Watkins is a stay-behind parent of two boys, age 15 and 10. She and her sons live in off-base housing near Ft. Dix in New Jersey. “After a visit from my husband, it takes at least a month for our family to readjust,” she said. “The kids get used to having us both there, and resent it when it’s just mom telling them what to do again. It’s almost impossible for me to restore order once my husband is gone.”

Compounding the problem, according to Kilgore, is the fact that when parents do come home, their children’s behavior can be less than desirable. “Basically, when mom and dad come back from war, there are problems. There’s a honeymoon period, then a lot of friction when parents have to reestablish discipline and hold kids’ feet to the fire. Sometimes the adjustment is not easy. The Total Transformation Program was the answer to that.”

So far, Kilgore says, “The feedback on the program has been tremendous. Everyone I’ve asked has said it’s been very helpful.” Additionally, “One female soldier here in a command position not only uses the Total Transformation concepts at home, but also is using the strategies with some of her younger soldiers and it's working very well,” said Kilgore, who plans to order more programs for the families under his care.

To try the Total Transformation Program in your home with your child free for 30 days, please visit www.thetotaltransformation.com.