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How Do You Stay Calm and Cool When Your Kids Get You Hot Under the Collar?

Posted by Kim Stricker

Random parenting discussions with friends have made me realize no matter what the situation of your family, children and parents both behave badly at times. I tend to think I deal with many more behavior issues than the average parent because my child is ADHD and on the autism spectrum. The more behavior issues, the more patience needed. However, I think all parents need ways to stay calm and cool when faced with the continuous confrontation mode from their child.

On the other hand, it could just be that my child is strong-willed and feels he should make most, if not all, decisions. Every day. Every minute. Just like many children do. Parents of all types of children with and without behavior issues are struggling to raise responsible children. And it is a struggle. Sometimes the biggest hurdle is to remain calm and collected when dealing with challenging behavior.

Apparently, my friend’s third grade girl, who has no behavior labels, is difficult on a daily basis. This third grader truly believes there is no good reason she cannot do whatever she wants when she wants. As my friend and I commiserated together, we agreed we can usually deal with the trying behaviors. We redirect the behavior and move on. Most of the time.

For all that, when it is the fiftieth episode in sixty minutes, patience and maturity sometimes vanish. We regress to equally childish behaviors and frustrations. We know these sporadic episodes are not productive.

We, as parents, need to step in, and carefully and calmly structure their thought processes and decision-making. Any hints for keeping your cool.


About Kim Stricker

Kim Stricker is a mom to two boys, an elementary school teacher, and freelance writer. She also writes a blog called lifeslikethis about the daily experiences of raising a child with Asperger’s and ADHD.

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