It is very common for children to use acting out as a way of solving their problems. As a result, parents can get stuck in patterns where they are being manipulated to respond in a certain way to their child’s behavior. Common or not, manipulation can be a really challenging and frustrating behavior to deal with.
Have you noticed that your child has started to use power and control in an attempt to get what s/he wants? From the preschooler who uses your fear of a public tantrum to get you to buy a candy bar in the checkout line to the teenager who gets angry and verbally abusive when you tell him he can’t go to a party, our experts have seen it all and know the proven techniques to help you reset the power dynamic in your family. You will find advice about seeing the difference between persuasion and manipulation and what is a normal and healthy part of development versus what crosses the line, as well as how to respond effectively when your child is using manipulation to gain control.
Ready to end the manipulation once and for all? Get started with our articles below.
“My kids are driving me crazy! They are so manipulative I can’t stand it!” Does this sound familiar? "My middle schooler blackmails me emotionally – he cries that I 'don’t care about him and love his brother more' when I ask him to stop playing his video games. It's true that he's a more difficult kid,... Read more »
For many children, behavior problems are not universal; they’re targeted. Targeted at dad, at mom, at the stepmother, at the fiancé, at a sibling. The following two case studies reveal how normally charming and compliant children can become defiant or even abusive with one person in the family. James Lehman examines why this happens and... Read more »
Does your child use anger or threats to get what he wants? Does he pick fights and blackmail you emotionally? Or maybe he acts helpless or plays sick to get out of doing chores or homework. Whether kids manipulate us aggressively or passively, this behavior makes most of us feel out of control and “played”... Read more »
Kids manipulate their parents. It’s part of their normal routine. They learn to use their charms and strengths to get their way and negotiate more power in the family. On the one hand, some forms of manipulation by kids are harmless. For example, if your daughter wants to go to a dance on a Saturday night,... Read more »
“It was always like walking on eggshells around here. Very tense,” says Josephine, mother of 17-year-old Jamie. “She was totally disrespectful and condescending and I was ready to throw her out.” Josephine recalls how her “blood was always boiling” at home because her daughter’s unending anger stoked her own anger, and she dreaded the next... Read more »
