When you're the parent of an acting-out child, it's easy to feel as if you're to blame for their behavior. As a result, you can fall into the trap of trying to fix things for your child instead of letting them deal with the natural and logical consequences of their behavior. In this interview, James... Read more »
“I was just kidding! Can’t you take a joke?” If your child gives you this excuse after he’s said or done something rude, it might leave you feeling frustrated and unsure of how to handle the situation. Later, you might question yourself when he says, “But I didn’t mean it that way.” In this article,... Read more »
Have you sent your acting-out, verbally abusive or behaviorally-disordered child to counseling, only to find that it didn't improve his behavior at all? Or maybe counseling worked for awhile, but then your child fell back into the same old patterns of behavior. Counseling for kids can be effective and helpful, but not all counseling is... Read more »
Sometimes you have to let your child fail. Parents often do their kids a disservice when they protect them from natural consequences when they take over for their kids to ensure that their kids don’t fail. While it’s natural for parents to worry about failure, there are times when it can be productive for kids—and a... Read more »
How many times has this happened to you? You set a limit on behavior, and your kids ask, “Why?” or ignore your limits entirely. Or perhaps it’s a war of inches—your adolescent tests you by coming in a few minutes later past curfew each time he goes out. Then he accuses you of being petty... Read more »
Most kids go through phases where they are sassy, sarcastic, mouthy, or disrespectful. As a parent, it's hard to know when to let it slide and when to address the problem. That's why parents often ask me the following: "How do you differentiate between disrespectful, sassy, or fresh language and abusive language?" These behaviors are... Read more »
There are times when your authority as a parent just isn’t enough. There are times that you may need to call the police on your child. If your child's behavior has escalated to the point of physical abuse, assault, and destruction of property, or if he is engaging in risky or dangerous behavior outside the home,... Read more »
Many parents write in to Empowering Parents and ask, “Is it too late to change the way I parent my child—and will it actually work if I do?” In this article, James Lehman explains how you can change the way you parent, and why your child’s behavior has a much better chance of improving when... Read more »
In part 2 of this two-part series, James discusses exactly what to do when your children get in trouble for fighting at school or at home—and the right kinds of consequences to give them so they learn to use appropriate behavior instead of lashing out when they feel like hitting someone the next time. Read... Read more »
Does your child always seem to get in trouble for fighting? You’ve tried talking to him, but the aggressive behavior hasn’t stopped—he still roughhouses with his siblings at home to the point of injury, brawls with kids on the bus and gets into fistfights at school. In part 1 of this two-part series on aggressive... Read more »