Articles by James Lehman, MSW - page 12

Mom talking with teenage boy

Teen Curfews—How and When to Negotiate



It’s important to teach kids how to negotiate because it’s a necessary life skill. But don't let them negotiate away your power as a parent. Unfortunately, this is what happens when you give in or over-negotiate with your kids. As parents, we don’t set out to over-negotiate. But then our kids whine, argue, and resist.... Read more »

child having a temper tantrum

Managing Your Child’s Meltdowns and Tantrums



The parents I've worked with often have ineffective ways of responding to and managing their child's meltdowns. They either go to one extreme and yell, threaten, restrain, or even spank the child, or they go to the other extreme and give in. In both cases, the parent may stop the meltdown, but they haven't taught... Read more »

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The Bullying Parent: Why Aggressive Parenting Doesn’t Work



Parents who don’t have effective parenting skills will often use aggression as a substitute. This is especially common with parents who don’t have good relationships or effective coping skills and use aggression to compensate for a whole range of things. Ultimately, it can lead to aggression with their kids. When you use aggression as a parenting... Read more »

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Do You Tiptoe Around Your Child?



There's a difference between being considerate of your child and tiptoeing around them. We all want to be considerate of our children. If there are things that our children have to face in life that are upsetting to them, then we want to be considerate in terms of the intensity and frequency of how often... Read more »

Teenage boy showing disrespect

The Jekyll and Hyde Child: Targeted Behavior Problems



For many children, behavior problems are not universal; they’re targeted. Targeted at dad, at mom, at the stepmother, at the fiancé, at a sibling. The following two case studies reveal how normally charming and compliant children can become defiant or even abusive with one person in the family. James Lehman examines why this happens and... Read more »

Unmotivated teenage boy staring blankly

Motivating the Unmotivated Child



Over the years, many parents have asked me why their kids aren't motivated and what they can do about it. How can you get your child to be more motivated? To do better in school? To even go to school? The important thing to remember is this: your child is motivated. They’re just motivated to... Read more »

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