Arguing & Fighting

Does your home sometimes feel like a battle zone?

Whether the argument occurs between you and your child or between siblings, these intense interactions have a way of wearing a parent down like no other behavior. Many parents find themselves pulled into an argument before they're even aware it’s happened. It can be tempting to stay engaged in these discussions, to try and win the argument or to get your child to understand your point of view.

In these moments, it can be helpful to recognize the purpose arguing serves for your child – it gives him power and the perceived notion that he can challenge you. Arguing and fighting levels the playing field and supports the idea that you and your child are peers. Keep in mind - you don’t have to attend every argument you’re invited to, as James Lehman reminds us in The Total Transformation Program.

You can walk away from an argument and teach your child better ways of solving his problems.

Arguing With Your Child? Five Things You Shouldn’t Do

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35 Comments

For many parents, every conversation with their kids seems to turn into an argument. The parents I have worked with get completely frustrated and then don’t know how to make it stop. Whether it’s during a difficult time (like adolescence) or over several years, arguing can seem like the only form of communication that parents... Read more »

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Mom turning away from teen daughter who is yelling at her.

How to Walk Away From a Fight With Your Child

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You’ve probably heard these words of advice before: “Just walk away when your child is trying to pull you into a fight.” Kids argue with their parents all the time and, in many cases, it's tolerable and normal. But when your child becomes disrespectful, starts to yell or swear, or becomes irate and won't calm down,... Read more »

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